Wednesday, November 25, 2015


Oh my god! It's been 24 hours since I came here to Mount Saini Hospital and 52 hours since I have ate or drank. I'm so frustrated and exhausted because the kept giving me tests and x-rays, and kept postponing my procedure. Now they say I need to wait until the morning to have it done.

Kill me now!

Monday, November 23, 2015

A Good Day Except For ...

It was a good and productive day. 

My building put a new smoke alarm in my apartment, and they promised to fix the taps of my sink.

I bought vitamins at Whole Health, and drugs for pain at Shoppers.

At College Park, I picked up my speech from The Printing House; made a dentist appointment; and bought gift bags at Dollarama.

Afterwards, I went to Loblaws and bought groceries.

I was happy that I got so much done, and I was planninng on finishing my most recent painting after dinner.

Unfortunately, some food got stuck in my throat and it won't move.


Sunday, November 22, 2015

Being Single-Minded

I'm proud of myself!  I was very single-minded today and just focused upon the task of writing my speech. No emails, painting, or ordering merch - just writing!

I'm almost finished too!

Saturday, November 21, 2015

Short and Sweet

Despite looking my brightest and most approachable, sales were pretty dismal.  Hopefully, things will be better next week.

Oh well, back to emails and working on my speech ....

Friday, November 20, 2015


I'm tired.  Last night my mind just wouldn't allow me to go to sleep.  It picked and nagged at me, making me stay up until 3am writing emails.  And, at 7am, my mind woke me up (and kept me awake), insisting that I keep on working.

The nagging isn't the worst part, though.  It's the berating, over and over, about my imperfections.  And the worrying - oh my god, the worrying!  The state of the world; getting Hershey's teeth cleaned; getting my teeth cleaned; the small, flat mole on my thigh seeming to grow slightly.

Was I having a heart attack or a panic attack?

Was I dying?  Did I care?

Mind, stop TORTURING ME!  I need to sleep tonight, so please SHUT UP!

 Shhhhhhhhhh ....

Thursday, November 19, 2015

A Beautiful November Day

My boys noticed the beauty of the day before I did.

Well, now I'm going to take a page from their book and relax and enjoy this extraordinary balmy weather.


... After I paint for awhile!

Wednesday, November 18, 2015

One By One

One by one I'm crossing off my mental list:

  • Picked up prescription
  • Purchased cat food from vet
  • Picked up package from post office
  • Signed my employees' paycheques
  • Replied to important emails
  • Bought birthday gift for friend

Tomorrow, I'll focus upon my painting or my speech - or upon both!

Tuesday, November 17, 2015


Words.  Lots and lots were used today in emails, texts, and phone calls.

I arranged for a custom made piece of Plexiglas to be delivered to my home sometime next week.  It's going to go on top of my kitchen table to protect my new tablecloth from cat claws.

I contacted customers about their orders and contacted some of my friends whom I hadn't heard from in awhile.  Plus, I contacted my friend Lynn, who's a speech/language pathologist at U of T, to ask what time she wanted me to give my talk to her class next week.

 Tomorrow, I need to work on the aforementioned speech; order more cat food; get a prescription re-filled; sign cheques; work on the current employees' schedule; reply to more emails; and, find time to paint.

No rest for the wicked!

Sunday, November 15, 2015

Merch on My Mind

I had such a great day at the market yesterday.  It was one of those days when people were super chatty and friendly, and who were so into my artwork and merchandise that they bought tons of it!

Don't get me wrong, this was a great boost for my finances and for my confidence.  It is so gratifying to see how much people appreciate my art! Two customers even asked me to paint portraits for them.

And yet ... during November and December I know that I'll be EXTREMELY busy painting pictures; designing my images so that I can order more merch to sell at the market or online.  It's like some crazy never-ending merry-go-round!

Fortunately, I Don't Get Tired!

Saturday, November 14, 2015

A Fun Evening with Laura Mac Part II

I took my friend Laura out to dinner at Cafe California as a belated birthday present. (Her birthday was on November 5th.)

We ate, drank, chatted, and laughed.  Dinner was my birthday present to Laura, but she also gave me gifts: socks with cats on them and, from her partner AJ, a book on Coronation Street.

After dinner,  we went and bought beer; chocolate bourbon liqueur; two kinds of chips; and a container of ice cream.

If that wasn't enough fun, we also watched Magic Mike XXL!

Oh what a great night!

Thursday, November 12, 2015

A Change is as Good as a Rest

Yay!  I've put a fresh new tablecloth on my kitchen table.  It looks way better than the one I took off. And, it actually put me in a better mood too. A fresh tablecloth, a fresh start.

Rascal, on the other hand, has a different opinion.  He, like other cats, views change with great suspicion.

Well, tough toenails, Rascal - I like it!

Wednesday, November 11, 2015

Figuring Out Anxiety

Today my counsellor asked me to make a note of every time I feel anxious about something. I'm also supposed to include reasons why these certain things make me anxious.

(I didn't say this to my counselor but I thought, Get ready for a book! Practically everything gives me feelings of anxiety.)

I'm going to paint now.  If I don't finish this painting by the time my customer wants it, I'll definitely start to feel the pangs of anxiety!